When Grief Makes Us Feel Like a Grinch
2015 was the first year that I ever remember not looking forward to Christmas.
It had always been my absolute favorite holiday, filled with family traditions, magical memories, and lots of Christmas cookies!
That year, however, as the season approached, I began to dread adorning the tree with lights, watching my favorite holiday movies, and enjoying all of the beautiful decorations.
Why?
Because I wouldn’t be able to see any of it.
I had lost my sight that May, and, in my mind, no amount of Christmas cheer could prepare me for all of the changes that my blindness would bring to the beloved holiday.
My grief made me feel like the grinch, sitting high on Mount Crumpit, drowning out all of the joyful noise.
Have you ever struggled with this feeling?
Maybe you have faced a hardship this year that makes Christmas just seem a little dimmer.
One of my good friends is dealing with this right now. She recently lost her husband of over 60 years. For her and her family, it feels as though there is a big piece missing from their holiday festivities.
In these situations, it can be easy for us to simply want to ignore Christmas altogether.
Sara Claudia and her dog, Sully, looking at the camera smiling in front of her Christmas tree and gifts.
How can we have Christmas cheer in the midst of pain and grief?
To answer this question, we have to think a little more deeply about the meaning of Christmas.
I love this quote from the book, A Happy Trails Christmas, “Christmas is not a moment in time nor a date on the calendar but a state of the heart.”
When we think about Christmas from God’s perspective, we realize that it is really all about an ultimate act of love.
“God showed how much he loved us by sending His one and only son into the world so that we might have eternal life through Him. This is real love, not that we love God, but that He loved us and sent His Son as a sacrifice to take away our sins.”
(1 John 4 9-10)
Only a God who loves us so unconditionally, completely, and eternally would make such a selfless sacrifice.
So, Christmas isn’t really about the cookies, or the lights, or the fun family traditions.
It is about God’s love for us.
It is a love that is all-encompassing, comforting, and unfailing. “Now let your unfailing love comfort me, just as you promised me, your servant.”
(Psalm 119:76)
And, there is nothing, no amount of grief or pain, that can keep it at bay.
“And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow. Not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love.”
(Romans 8:38)
Sara Claudia, her sister, Beth, and her brother-in-law, Price, cheering with peppermint coffee on Christmas Day.
If you are missing some Christmas cheer this season, allow God’s compassion and mercy to fill up your heart.
The hope I find in God’s love is what helps me enjoy Christmas, and every day, without my sight.
It is what will help a widow make it through her first Christmas without her husband of over sixty years.
And, that everlasting love is what will wrap you up tight this season, and bring you joy no matter what you are facing.
