Faith in the Wilderness with Meshea Ingram

Today’s guest blog is written by Meshea Ingram. Meshea Ingram grew up a preacher’s kid in the quaint town of Bremen, Georgia. She is a self-proclaimed writer, Christian life-style blogger, founder and president of Love Can Build A Briggs Charitable Foundation, and proud Liberty University graduate, where she obtained a degree in Psychology: Christian Counseling. Meshea is also a firefighter wife of 12 years and a blessed mother of two. She chases daily after God, seeking to spread His goodness wherever He so wills, as she embarks on a journey of finding hope in grief after the loss of her son, Brigham “Briggs” Ingram. Connect with her at www.lovecanbuildabriggs.com or on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/she_who_prays

We celebrated our son’s second birthday in heaven yesterday, which would have been his fourth birthday on earth.

I find it no coincidence that God in all His divine will would allow me to share a story of faith just one day after our belated child’s birthday, and just two days after Christmas. What should be a celebratory season, filled with hope, joy, and fulfilled prophecy, is riddled with such sadness for so many, including myself. As we celebrate the birth of a Savior, we mourn the loss of our very own promise, our only son, Briggs. I will never forget the utter joy of finding out I was pregnant with him, just one year after losing his unborn sibling. The immense pain, tears, questions, and prayers that preceded Briggs arrival were ever-constant, and were, then, one of the darkest times of my life. 

Upon Briggs much-anticipated arrival, I thought our time in what I often refer to as “the wilderness,” was finally over.

God had given us our rainbow baby, our promise after quite the storm. We moved into our “forever” home, a little farmhouse nestled on 11 generously wooded acres, just one week before his birth, on December 26, 2019. Briggs was due any day, and unpacked boxes checkered the floor like an unfinished game of chess, nonetheless, my Christmas tree was the first to be finished in our new home. “What a season of cheer,” I thought, both Christmas and the arrival of new life into our family. All was calm, all was bright. 

Until one day, it wasn't. 

Just a short two-and-a-half years later, all was wrong. What was meant to be an innocent, fun family weekend at the lake, turned into our worst nightmare. On July 17, 2022, our very own ray of sunshine, our Briggs, was involved in a drowning accident at our family’s lake house and remained on life support for 5 days, until passing on July 22nd. During those 5 dreadful days, I prayed and exemplified more faith than I ever had in my entire life. Truthfully, it was easier to believe God was going to heal my baby, than not. Why wouldn’t God honor my prayer as He had so many times before, and why allow Briggs’ accident if not to heal him and strengthen the faith of so many praying? Isn’t faith believing for the miraculous, after all? 

I struggled for months after his passing trying to understand why my faith hadn’t willed Briggs to live.

I received messages from discouraged believers asking how I kept moving forward in faith, knowing God hadn’t answered my prayer. I, despite my own confusion, desperately fought to encourage others in their faith, refusing to allow our story to make God a villain. I knew God was and is good, no matter our circumstances, and that His plan was greater, even if we couldn’t see it at the time. Ultimately, my determination to continue trusting God came more from a place of desperation than strength. I knew if I let go of the one thing keeping me from complete insanity, that I would lose myself to grief, and may, if the Lord allowed, never return from such a place as dark and empty as the depths of loss.

I quickly realized that I had not previously understood the true meaning of faith and what it meant to be “tried with fire.”

Faith though can be miraculous in such ways as physical healing, is more about believing than seeing. Having faith that God could heal Briggs proved I didn’t doubt God’s power, but trusting Him after He didn’t heal him, proved a true faithfulness to Christ. We know God is capable because He is God, but sometimes “no” is His answer, and trusting His will over our desire is the ultimate act of faith. Job, whom scripture refers to as a “perfect and upright” man, faced incomprehensible heartache, and still, he, not once, blamed or forsook God, despite never receiving an answer for his suffering. Perhaps there was a greater purpose beyond even our understanding of the story told in the Bible, but what does Job’s life do for us today? It encourages us to remain faithful to God, even in our worst trials.  

Hebrews 11:1 tells us,

“And faith is the substance of things hoped for, and the evidence of things not seen.”

I may not see God, but there is evidence of His existence through my faith in Him. I can see His hand throughout every part of my life; thus, I know Him to be faithful and true, therefore I believe His word, and when He says, “All things work together for good to them that love God,” I have faith that the trials of this life, including our tragedy, will work for our good, and bring glory to God. 

Though there have been times in the last year when the fruit of our labor has not been evident, and our pain and heartache have felt too much to bear, I am often reminded of and encouraged by this verse,

“That the trial of your faith, being much more precious than of gold that perisheth, though it be tried with fire, might be found unto praise and honour and glory at the appearing of Jesus Christ: whom having not seen, ye love; in whom, though now ye see him not, yet believing, ye rejoice with joy unspeakable and full of glory: receiving the end of your faith, even the salvation of your souls.” 1 Peter‬ 1‬:7‬-9.

The trials of this life are not in vain, and the faith we continue to walk by does not go unnoticed by God.

Our reward is far greater than our minds can even imagine, and one day, maybe not while on this earth, but certainly in heaven, we will see and understand God’s greater purpose. 

“And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not.” Galatians 6:9

Meshea walking behind her son, Briggs, who is running through water at the beach.

Text that says, “This blog is sponsored by:”

Dr. Donna Thomas Moses, who specializes in Periodontics, temporomandibular complex (TMJ), and dental implants. At her practice, she strives to make you feel comfortable and relaxed throughout your evaluation and treatment.  
Ashlee Burgess Photography, which has been a photography business in the West Georgia area since 2014. Specializing in weddings, elopements, and couples, Ashlee also loves working with seniors & individuals for portraits! No matter the subject in front of her camera, her goal is to create warm, dreamy images that capture the emotion of your most precious moments.